Even though we don’t want to, we often succumb to our own fears. We enable ourselves to not fight those but to find comfort in feeling scared and helpless. This past year has made us fight all kinds of battles even though we were never ready for any. Learning and unlearning became the new normal each day as we woke up – and here we are a year later still hopeful and eager to shine through.
Why don’t we demonstrate the same eagerness or ability to just be hopeful or positive in all things that life throws at us? Since when have we stopped chasing our dreams? How long before we realize what actually makes us happy?
I am still in the process of figuring my way through this maze.
One of my biggest fears/dreams at the same time has been to travel solo. Every time I get all pumped with this idea, some strange chemical reaction happens inside that brain of mine, and I soon take 10 steps back with no sign of coming back into the game. Last year was all about conditioning my system to actually get back into this game, while luckily this year has somewhat been meaningful.
I started 2021 with the idea of nurturing the concept of traveling (solo) and give myself those much needed wings. Even before things actually took off, I was kicked by the idea alone. I had multiple dialogues with myself – almost where one version was trying to convince the other one. It wasn’t all that great an experience - let me tell you guys.
But I was done staring blank at these failed attempts and desperately wanted to break the chain; I wanted to take a leap of faith. I wanted to push myself out of my comfort zone and really be able to finally conquer my fear – fear of traveling solo.
After spending close to 10 odd months cocooned in my comfort place – my home – it was time to up my game and actually take control over things – almost in a way I’ve never taken control before. There was this sudden rush in energy and adrenaline kicked in, and I was ready to take up my first solo trip.
I went ahead and even signed up for a day-long trek in Maharashtra (state in India and not too far from home) just to loosen up those lesser active muscles and prepare myself for the real deal. Unfortunately, it didn’t go as planned and was called off by the organizer due to the sudden spike in Covid-19 cases. I was kicking myself; felt lost and shattered; I broke down one afternoon too as my heart sank and numbness came over me. No logical reasoning or consolation helped. In that moment, I knew it wasn’t meant to be.
Months went by and I was still morose. But something big happened! It was a major turning point.
The big “gram” fan that I am, I pretty much follow all the who’s who in the travel blogging world. Little did I know, I randomly came across a post for a seven-day Spiti Valley road-trip. In the past, I’ve seen travelers, bloggers, photographers coming back from this place with this exceptional high and that showed in their work or writing; and I always had this impression about Spiti being this gorgeous destination in the upper Himachal but a hard one to get access to. Who would have known that I’d even consider signing up for a trip that would take me to that very place?
Few seats left! DM me if you want to join! – That’s how it all began!
I jumped out of my couch and typed “I am in!”
A week later, I was a proud participant of the 10-member gang. We were scheduled to hit the road in less than a month’s time and I couldn’t have been happier. From knowing nothing, I had gotten to a point of knowing a little about things that I needed to carry or how to prepare 1,000 other things before the big day arrived. I knew nobody in that group; I knew nothing about what to expect, or what not to expect. I knew I had finally broken the curse and taken my leap of faith. I was ready for Spiti Valley!
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